Daily Archives: November 15, 2001

Just 12 more pages of rewriting. Just 12 more pages…

This is my mistake
Let me make it good
I raised the wall
And I will be the one to knock it down…
This is my world and I am world-leader pretend.
This my Life.
And this my Time.
I have been given the freedom to do as I see fit.
It’s high time I razed the walls I’ve constructed.

I’d forgotten how much I like this album, even despite “Stand.”

Dream this morning:
I was at my parent’s house. I was sent to take out the garbage. Immediately before that my mom had been asking me about Dima, so it seems to me this was set slightly in the past. As an answer I quoted her some woeful song lyrics. By Depeche Mode, I think, but now I can’t what song it was. Anyway, the garbage cans were way in the back corner of the yard. Opposite of where the used to be in real life. As I was walking back to the house, a strange were-wolf thing growled at me from the other side of the chain link fence. It looked at me and let out a growling scream. My dad was outside fixing the car and I yelled at him that there was a wolf, worg thing. There were also nuns living next door to us and they were outside working on their garden. The were-wolf had circled around our yard, but stopped to attack one of the nuns. My dad saw this happen and took off to distract the were-wolf. The nun, a little woman with dark hair, ran off and the thing started attacking my dad. This was a way away from me, out in the street. I started yelling from near our side door, hoping to get it away from my dad. Another nun attracted its attention and I went inside even though I wasn’t sure my dad was safe. A few seconds later the second nun, with long gray hair, was at the door and I let her in. My dad crashed through too, the were-wolf right behind him. We closed the door though and were safe. The thing kept screeching though, a horrible sound. I asked the nun if she was okay. She showed me deep scratches on her leg, and I said I would go get peroxide so they wouldn’t get infected. The nun had other ideas though. She went to the door and opened it, saying a prayer to send the were-wolf away. The were-wolf attacked instead, chasing the nun into our house. At that point I woke up.

I dream of nuns occasionally. They are usually in danger from some twisted animal, here a were-wolf, in another dream a mutant orca whale. “Do you consider nuns to be good women? Some of the best teachers I’ve had are nuns,” Eric said when I told him this dream. “I suppose,” I said. “Actually, I don’t think about nuns much at all. In my dreams they do un-wise things.” And it’s usually connected to their religion. So what does this dream mean? More happens in this one than my orca dream. There isn’t as much helplessness as in my slasher dreams. It’s more that other people’s actions mess up perfectly good plans made by me. How is this true in my life at the moment?